Daily Archives: December 6, 2009

East Jesus Nowhere – Ticket to Hell Has Never Been So Fun!

NOTE: I drafted this a while ago but never published it.

Blasphemy - A Ticket to Hell Has Never Been Funnier

Blasphemy - A Ticket to Hell Has Never Been Funnier

I will mince no words: I like to curse and I have little respect for organized religion. In this video from Green Day’s show in Sacramento earlier this year, Green Day managed to provide me with cursing and remind me just how little respect I have for organized religion. Once again, Green Day has the courage to call hypocrisy when they see it.

Billie Throwing a Guy Out and East Jesus Nowhere – “Fuck me? Nononononono, fuck YOU mother fucker.” – Green Day, Sacramento, August 24, 2009

With that said, I want to take a moment to put the title of the posting into context… and then hopefully say something. We’ll see if any of the above happens.

During the American tour (which can provide a basic roadmap for those of you looking forward to the European, Australian, New Zealand and Asian tours), “East Jesus Nowhere,” was usually the fourth song of the show, preceded by “Song of the Century,” “21st Century Breakdown,” and “Know Your Enemy.” Billie may say some crazy stuff about pot-smoking and fornicating at the beginning, (haha, one only hopes he does!), and then the band launches into the song. At the record’s bridge, Billie asks the audience to provide a child, any child about 10 years or so of age, which parents in the house readily do. Billie then ‘saves’ this sweet and innocent youngster. I’m never sure what he’s saving the kid from, but I know that I would have much rather been saved by a Billie Joe than by a preacher.

Here comes the requisite disclaimer in this day and age: I do not dislike religion itself. My philosophy is worship anything you want but do not force me to worship the same way that you do. Don’t try to save me and I won’t try to save you, unless I see you about to get hit by a car on the street. Don’t preach purity when your bathroom is filthy. Or something like that.*

East Jesus Nowhere” is a powerful and problematic song. It’s destined to be on the radio. It’s also destined to cause some religious circles to go ballistic if it makes it there.

There’s been some buzz about whether the lyrics will be changed when it gets more airplay. I really hope the band doesn’t change a bit of it. We’ll see what the future brings. In fact, I heard it on the radio when driving in my rental car a while back and some words had been obliterated. Needless to say, I screamed a little bit.

East Jesus Nowhere lyrics

Raise your hands now to testify
Your confession will be crucified
You’re a sacrificial suicide
Like a dog that’s been sodomized
Stand up! – All the white boys
Sit down! – All the black girls
You’re the soldiers of the new world

Put your faith in a miracle
And it’s non-denominational
Join the choir we will be singing
In the church of wishful thinking

A fire burns today
Of blasphemy and genocide
The sirens of decay
Will infiltrate the faith fanatics

Oh bless me lord for I have sinned
It’s been a lifetime since I last confessed
I threw my crutches in “The river
Of a shadow of doubt”
And I’ll be dressed in my Sunday best

Say a prayer for the family
Drop a coin for humanity
Ain’t this uniform so flattering?
I never asked you a God damned thing

A fire burns today
Of blasphemy and genocide
The sirens of decay
Will infiltrate the faith fanatics

Don’t test me
Second guess me
Protest me
You will disappear

I want to know who’s allowed to breed
All the dogs who never learned to read
Missionary politicians
And the cops of a new religion

A fire burns today
Of blasphemy and genocide
The sirens of decay
Will infiltrate the inside

-also, these are my opinions alone and do not reflect anything that anyone else might think or say. There, I think that covers it.


Australia and New Zealand, WallaBabies!

Sorry for the delay in posting, but I’ve been in a bit of a funk for the past few days  thinking about California too much. It has started to turn cold here in New York City, and it’s snowing both inside and outside of my apartment now. However, I don’t think you’ve come here to listen to me bitch and moan. Or did you?

I think not!

So instead, let’s take a mental trip to the Great Down Under where our boys, Billie Joe, Mike and Tré and their badass crew have come to the hot summer rescue of thousands of Aussie and New Zealand fans on a two-week tour of those countries. The tour kicked off at the Burswood Dome in Perth yesterday, December 4th and heads off to Adelaide, Brisbane, and Sydney, with two nights in Auckland, New Zealand, and wrapping up on December 19th.

Luckily, we got a little bit of Storytime with Billie (see a selection of previous Storytimes here) in Perth, thanks to this Youtube of “Give Me Novacaine” that karma1215 at the GDC found:

Billie Joe Tells a Story of Attending a Non-Lesbian Mud Wrestling Boxing Match in Perth with Australian Boxer Danny Green

I tried to keep up with what happened at the Perth concert (read about the show here), but if you’ve heard of a thing called a TIME ZONE, then you know it’s difficult to check out what’s happening at a concert that starts at 7:00 AM for you. Ha! Those boys are gonna have a helluva jetlag time when they get back home and then trot off to Japan and the Far East in January. Aww.

Don’t feel too sorry for their jetlag, though. They are having a damned good time with reports of them attending a Lesbian mud wrestling match and Tré Cool jumping out of airplanes, playing golf, applying for bartending jobs and wrestling sharks and shit. Oh wait, the shark part isn’t true. But I’m sure he’d try if he could! (Please don’t get any crazy shark rassling ideas, dude.)

Here is a small set of photographs from the show in Perth, with shots of the fans, and the opening band, Jet.

Well, that’s it from Aussie country for now. The next show is in Adelaide, on December 6th, whenever the fuck time that works out to be!

News from the GDC and Google Alerts


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